Other Tips When Looking at Specialists

We met with Selena’s Psychologist last week to go over the numerous questionnaires we all had to fill out. The results were truly what we expected with Anxiety Disorders the main source of her problems. She was very different in his office from the calm we seen in the waiting room. We mentioned several times that her anxiety was high but the Psychologist misinterpreted her behaviors as not having the attention. He gave us a few things to try here at home to help her through the calming process.

We fully expected her to reject some of these things at first and that their would be other behavioral issues we would see. What we got though was not what any of us expected. I called and made an appointment for just him and I to meet. The morning of that appointment Selena was pretty anxious even though she was not going with me. She finally admitted to having panic attacks or in her words “Funny feelings in her heart.”

Her psychologist felt horrible that he had not picked up on how bad her anxieties truly are and misread her behaviors. He literally grabbed the information about the other psychologists there in the office. We could switch if we wanted to. Of course that was not something I wanted to do so I asked him to put the information back on his desk and just talk with me first. As we talked and I shared more about what behaviors we had seen, and about her panic attacks, he realized I was not in there as a mom under attack mode but more of a mom just saying you need to understand her more, listen to us more, and we need a new direction.

I can’t emphasize enough when ever you are looking for a specialist for your child first do your homework. You need someone who is going to be willing to say I am  human and do make mistakes, but we can still change. To often specialists just take the attitude that they know it all, but remember not any one  method will work for everybody especially when your dealing with a child.

Find someone who wants a relationship with you the parent, while their main job is to help the child, who knows that child better then anyone else…you the parent. They should always make time to listen, talk, and brainstorm with you the parent the options that will best fit the needs of your child.

We are glad that we took the extra time to meet one on one with our psychologist to discuss our concerns especially when we truly did not feel he was perceiving the whole picture of who Sunshine is and how she ticks.

My next posts will be on what we are doing, how they are or are not working. Just consider this as the beginning to a new life for Sunshine.